For most of my adult life, I’ve battled depression and anxiety—a relentless storm filled with despair, overwhelm, and self-loathing. I tried countless medications and quick fixes—exercise, diet changes, career moves, relationships—believing that each new endeavor might lift the fog. Yet, the initial excitement always faded, and the darkness crept back, a persistent reminder of my struggles.

Ten years ago I signed up for my first Awareness Institute weekend workshop because I’d had enough of myself. I’d had enough of the self-hatred and the self-pitying, enough of the shame and regret. I signed up for the workshop because something deep within me whispered, “There’s more to life than this.” A decade of living and loving later, I couldn’t be more grateful for that whisper.

All of us at the Awareness Institute believe in equal rights, freedom, and the miracle of diversity. Please enjoy a conscious and reflective Independence Day...This time the consequences of what we choose matter.

Throughout human history, and across cultures and traditions, the rite of passage known as “initiation” has signified a transformation - or a rebirth, into a new beginning.

Becoming a parent is undoubtedly one of life's most challenging and triggering roles. By delving into the kind of deep self-development work we do at the Institute, you open the door to a conscious and connected parenting experience.

After reading this message, we hope you’ll choose to join with us and reconnect with the source of energy and inspiration needed to fully embrace the life you were meant to live! Of course, the first step has to begin with you. The time is now...and Freedom is calling you back to life…

Everything has changed, and “nothing” has changed – maybe you can relate?

Well, 2017 is shaping up in ways that none of us expected and have ever experienced. As surprising national and global upheavals continue, we are all being challenged to stay present, centered and focused on the priorities in our lives.

A few days ago I was talking to a family friend and mentioned that I’d hit an overwhelm threshold the week before. His response: “I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t overwhelmed.”

I wake up many morning to a feeling of unease…dis-ease. Disease. The disease of fear.

After a recent Wednesday evening at the Awareness Institute, I was holding in some unexpressed feelings and seriously looking towards escaping out the back door, when a friend suddenly appeared in front of me and put her hand on my shoulder. She leaned in towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly asked, “How ARE you?” in a gentle, open and wide-eyed way, with a soft smile.

Years ago, during some serious marital strife, I was driving home from work early one morning, contemplating what had become of my life. I considered that the payoff from my homeowner’s insurance, should I die, meant that I was worth more to my family dead than alive. Such was the state of my broken heart.

Yesterday was incredibly powerful in the most subtle of ways. It challenged all my notions of loyalty, relationship, experience… All my beliefs about what it means to have a son who died at 29 and how I am supposed to live with that… I’ve been working on it for a long time now, since 2003, and it has become easier but no less profound.

I recently spent a Sunday morning working in a friend’s garden and learned a lot about myself (and how I do life) in the process…

I’m currently surrendering to *trusting the process* FIRST. Historically, trusting has been a last resort for me.

The eccentric man who sat before me crossed his legs and reclined further in the metal folding chair, arms stretched out over the back of it, creating the illusion of comfort. His eyes peered into me with the help of eyeglasses that made perfect circles around his eyes. He cocked his head to the side and proceeded to ask me, “Do you adore yourself?”

I love my daily breathing/meditation practice. I love writing in my journal. I love cooking myself healthy food. I love sitting in my favorite chair with a steaming hot cup of tea. But sometimes I get busy, or I’m not feeling well, or life happens, and without even realizing it, I get out of the routine of doing these things I love.

I spent many years of my life badmouthing, criticizing, judging, attacking and generally rejecting everything about my mom. I’d go as far as to say I hated my mom. I didn’t really hate her, but the hurt was so deep, “hate” feels like the closest word to describe it. Though I didn’t say it out loud, I’m sure she felt it.

Children absorb and mimic the world around them. My parents, limited by their own conditioning, weren’t equipped to teach me how to consciously relate with myself and others…and even after years of talk therapy, I found myself repeating the same relationship patterns I’d learned as a child. Maybe you can relate?

It’s the end of January and for many of us, that means one thing: failure.